When is the last time you spent quality time with your self? -- Every morning is very intentional alone time
What do you associate with solitude? -- creativity
What fears bring you towards or away from people? -- I know I need a lot of alone time to feed creativity. I "schedule" people later in the day when my brain is at its lowest ability or desire to create.
What feedback do you have? What are the gaps in my thinking? What would you add? I think your observations of yourself as a child are so interesting. Chloe was even quieter. Now you are extroverted and Chloe REALLY puts herself out there. It's interesting that you both shifted so much. (I won' t even get into to Spencer!)
The only thing I'd like to add is "seasons." Your needs/desires now won't stay consistent, and that's OK. There are seasons to have more solitude and seasons where you don't even get to go to the bathroom alone. It's all great.
This stood out to me: "Maybe it’s because I struggle to sit with my own thoughts and prefer to hear them in conversation with others, or drown them out with podcasts or music."
My wife is the oldest of seven. I have one sibling (four years older). I greatly prefer quiet and solitude, but my wife is always listening to podcasts, music, or youtube videos. One of my students told me once that people who grow up in big families are used to and comforted by background noise. It was something I had never even considered -- the size of our families as children and how that may (or may not) impact our want for company/solitude
Very proud of you for pushing outside of your comfort zone and practicing solitude in a big way! Even as an introvert, it's super hard for me, so this resonated with me a lot. :*
When is the last time you spent quality time with your self? - literally all the time. I need to find a person to talk to today or tomorrow.
What do you associate with solitude? - play, possibility, and adventure. When I spend extended periods in solitude, I find myself making and doing things I wouldn't have otherwise. I love going places alone, I feel like a "free agent." Being alone also leads me to randomly meet people who sometimes become unexpectedly valuable friends.
What fears bring you towards or away from people? - I am generally very determined to protect my autonomy, creativity, and productivity. I strongly believe "if you want different, move different." The times I'm drawn towards people, it's out of desire for connection. I hate the idea of other people being lonely and want to make space for community and meaningful conversation to alleviate that.
What feedback do you have? What are the gaps in my thinking? What would you add? - Sounds like you're a hard wired extrovert and there's nothing wrong with that. Not sure if growing up with siblings means much... I am your sibling and I am not an extrovert. I'm glad you're spending some time alone now.. sounds like you're going through some growing pains which was bound to happen. Lean into your creativity. I wish you had the book I gave you for Christmas... 'The Places that Scare You' by Pema Chodron.
adding the poem I sent you here if readers are interested too:
White Towels by Richard Jones
I have been studying the difference
between solitude and loneliness,
telling the story of my life
to the clean white towels taken warm from the dryer.
I carry them through the house
as though they were my children
asleep in my arms.
When is the last time you spent quality time with your self? -- Every morning is very intentional alone time
What do you associate with solitude? -- creativity
What fears bring you towards or away from people? -- I know I need a lot of alone time to feed creativity. I "schedule" people later in the day when my brain is at its lowest ability or desire to create.
What feedback do you have? What are the gaps in my thinking? What would you add? I think your observations of yourself as a child are so interesting. Chloe was even quieter. Now you are extroverted and Chloe REALLY puts herself out there. It's interesting that you both shifted so much. (I won' t even get into to Spencer!)
The only thing I'd like to add is "seasons." Your needs/desires now won't stay consistent, and that's OK. There are seasons to have more solitude and seasons where you don't even get to go to the bathroom alone. It's all great.
This stood out to me: "Maybe it’s because I struggle to sit with my own thoughts and prefer to hear them in conversation with others, or drown them out with podcasts or music."
My wife is the oldest of seven. I have one sibling (four years older). I greatly prefer quiet and solitude, but my wife is always listening to podcasts, music, or youtube videos. One of my students told me once that people who grow up in big families are used to and comforted by background noise. It was something I had never even considered -- the size of our families as children and how that may (or may not) impact our want for company/solitude
Very proud of you for pushing outside of your comfort zone and practicing solitude in a big way! Even as an introvert, it's super hard for me, so this resonated with me a lot. :*
Thoughtful!
When is the last time you spent quality time with your self? - literally all the time. I need to find a person to talk to today or tomorrow.
What do you associate with solitude? - play, possibility, and adventure. When I spend extended periods in solitude, I find myself making and doing things I wouldn't have otherwise. I love going places alone, I feel like a "free agent." Being alone also leads me to randomly meet people who sometimes become unexpectedly valuable friends.
What fears bring you towards or away from people? - I am generally very determined to protect my autonomy, creativity, and productivity. I strongly believe "if you want different, move different." The times I'm drawn towards people, it's out of desire for connection. I hate the idea of other people being lonely and want to make space for community and meaningful conversation to alleviate that.
What feedback do you have? What are the gaps in my thinking? What would you add? - Sounds like you're a hard wired extrovert and there's nothing wrong with that. Not sure if growing up with siblings means much... I am your sibling and I am not an extrovert. I'm glad you're spending some time alone now.. sounds like you're going through some growing pains which was bound to happen. Lean into your creativity. I wish you had the book I gave you for Christmas... 'The Places that Scare You' by Pema Chodron.
xoxoxoxo